Hi Stan,

Because of the pandemic, my son started getting into video games (especially multiplayer games). I’ve allowed him to play online as I want him to be connected with his friends and keep his play session with a sense of social interaction. However, after a few months he has started to lose interest. According to him, he feels like a failure because he doesn’t win that much. He has also had some bad experiences when playing with those who have no sense of sportsmanship. My son isn’t a pro but these encounters is making him lose interest in his favorite games. What can I do to help him as I don’t want him to lose interest in what he loves.

Appreciate your help,

My Advice

Ask Stan: Those of us who stream often deal with bullies and toxic viewers sometimes or always (depending on who we are). The most common answer to solving this problem has been “harden up”. However this is terrible advice and I would not recommend it (don’t be that kind of father). Instead there is two things you can do to help your son.

The first is to motivate him to not give up. I’m not a father but anytime I was ready to give up on something, my dad would always encourage and push me to try again. Remind him that the reason we fall is so we learn to get back up again. We all need a little support and a father (or parental figure) has always been a great source of motivation. The second is to remind him that these games are all about having fun. eSport players get paid and thus need to win. Your son is playing for fun and should dedicate his time to having fun.

If you like playing video games or want to spend more time with your son, play with him. The both of you could play together and work with him to improve his skills while boosting his confidence.

Ask Stan is a weekly advice column that will answer questions anyone has about gaming, anime, cosplay, conventions and more. You may submit your question and it will be published here (if selected).

8Bit/Digi is an independent media outlet that highlights the video game community and industry of the San Francisco Bay Area.

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